Can the "sleepy fantasy/fetish" be harmful to sexual relationships?

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paulpicks11

Join Date: Sep 09, 2009
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Post Date: Feb 02, 2010 09:29 AM
I had a truly amazing dream last night which I must tell all of you about. Just before retiring, I visited this website, Sleepycomics.com, and re-read some of the posts made on this forum, and I mused for awhile about what you guys were saying. Then I turned off the PC, jumped in bed beside my wife and slipped under the covers, still thinking about the things that have been said in this website. Sometime, in the middle of the night, I began to dream this amazing dream. I was inside a giant domed stadium, sitting on a speaker's platform with a dozen other dignitaries. The domed stadium was packed, it looked like at least 100,000 people were there. Somehow I knew intuitively that they were all seated in pairs as married couples throughout the stadium, and in my mind I calculated that there must be approximately 50,000 husbands and 50,000 wives present. The speaker at the microphone was Dr. Sander Gardos, Ph.D. (the sex therapist I began this forum with) and he was speaking to the crowd: "How many of you here are married?" he asked. The entire crowd raised their hands, everyone. "How many of you want to have children but do not have any?" he again asked. The entire crowd once again raised their hands -- all of them, 100%. Sitting on the speakers platform I was amazed at seeing and hearing all this, but my amazement was just beginning. I was even more astonished when Dr. Gardos continued and said: "How many of the husbands here regularly visit "Sleepycomics.com". At this point it looked to me that about one fifth of the men present raised their hands (In my mind I calculated that meant 10,000). Then the good doctor said "Keep your hands up men, and you wives seated next to a husband who has his hands up answer this question: 'How many of you wives whose husbands now have their hands up feel like your sexual relationship with your husband is seriously lacking?' " In my dream, I was amazed that about half of the wives (50%) seated beside these husbands raised their hands. (In my mind I calculated this to be about 5,000 women). Then Dr. Gardos said, "Men, if you are seated beside your wife and she has her hand up, you need to STOP PREFERRING YOUR SLEEPY FANTASY/FETISH to doing the real thing with your wife every now and then. If you want to have children, you have to do the real thing, not the fantasy thing!!" At that moment an ambulance siren sounded outside my bedroom window and as it sped on up past my street, I woke up and sat up in bed, wide awake, somewhat startled, and totally amazed, the dream still racing through my thoughts and in my head. I decided right then and there, I had to tell all of you about my dream, so the very next morning, when I got up that's what I proceeded to do. What more can I say . . . .?

bisochim

Join Date: Sep 24, 2009
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Post Date: Feb 17, 2010 11:09 AM
I think that honesty is of vital importance in a subject like this. It's been said, this fetish/fantasy could easily freak someone out, and if they just find it, they might get scared. Something like this should be discussed openly to make sure the partner doesn't find out late when they're already in love with you and they realize they're not comfortable with it. My wife knows, she knew when we were still dating. Once in a while, we even act it out. It's great!

It's been said, but I guess the bottom line here is not to keep it a secret from your significant other (it should still be noted, however, that it's not exactly first date talk XD) and don't try to actually do it with them. Keep it to acting.

I <3 eyerolls
paulpicks11

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Post Date: Feb 19, 2010 09:15 PM
Quote:
I think that honesty is of vital importance in a subject like this. It's been said, this fetish/fantasy could easily freak someone out, and if they just find it, they might get scared. Something like this should be discussed openly to make sure the partner doesn't find out late when they're already in love with you and they realize they're not comfortable with it. My wife knows, she knew when we were still dating. Once in a while, we even act it out. It's great!

It's been said, but I guess the bottom line here is not to keep it a secret from your significant other (it should still be noted, however, that it's not exactly first date talk XD) and don't try to actually do it with them. Keep it to acting.


Thanks B, I appreciate, and fully concur with your comments. But what about "preferring one's sleepy fantasy over the "real thing", what's your take on that??

paulpicks11

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Post Date: Apr 02, 2010 10:46 PM
I'M BACK AGAIN, GUYS. I RAN ACROSS ANOTHER INTERESTING ARTICLE ON AOL'S WELCOME PAGE AND BEGAN TO READ THE "POSTS" ON THE ARTICLE (filed on aol under: "AOL PERSONALS - DATING ARTICLES AND ADVICE" sub-filed under "Dating Advice and Tips"). The post that fascinated me was by someone identified as "jaime". MY EYES GOT LARGE WHEN I READ THIS SENTENCE THAT jaime POSTED: "LOOKING AT PORN IS SO NORMAL . . . . AT LEAST I THINK IT IS". OF COURSE, jaime SAYS VISITING SINGLES SITES ON THE INTERNET IS "CRAP", AND SHE'S OBVIOUSLY SPEAKING ABOUT MEN WHO ARE MARRIED, NOT SINGLE. BUT THE FACT THAT SHE THINKS LOOKING AT PORN IS NORMAL -- IT BLEW MY MIND. TO BE FAIR, I MUST TELL YOU ALL THAT ANOTHER POST MADE TO THIS SAME ARTICLE CALLS ALL INTERNET PORN "CRAP", BUT jaime APPARANTLY WOULD DISAGREE. TO HER IT'S "NORMAL". I'M AMAZED TO HEAR AND READ THAT SHE FEELS THIS WAY. I WONDER HOW MANY OTHER WOMEN MAY ALSO FEEL THIS WAY. IF THE PERCENTAGE WERE 30, OR 40 OR 50 PERCENT OF ALL WOMEN IT WOULD MEAN THAT MARRIED MEN WHO ENJOY SLEEPYCOMICS.COM
HAVE A GOOD CHANCE OF BEING MARRIED TO SOMEONE WHO THINKS THAT VIEWING SLEEPY COMIC BOOK SCENES IS "NORMAL". WHAT A GREAT THOUGHT THAT IS -- DON'T THE REST OF Y0U AGREE? OF COURSE, I HAVE NEVER CONSIDERED OUR FASCINATION WITH "SLEEPY" ART" OR "COMIC BOOKS" TO BE PORN -- PORN TO ME HAS TO CONTAIN FRONTAL NUDITY AND/OR EXPLICIT PORTRAYALS OF SEX ACTS. COMIC BOOK ART ALMOST NEVER PRESENTS EITHER OF THESE, SO IT IS NOT PORN, NOT AT ALL. STILL, THE IDEA THAT SOME WOMEN, PERHAPS MANY WOMEN, MIGHT THINK OF VIEWING sleepycomics.com AS "NORMAL" IS STIMULATING. WHAT DO THE REST OF YOU THINK??
jaime's post:
Apr 2nd 2010 @ 8:45PM
report%u2191%u2193
Looking at porn is so normal....at least i think it is. However-signing up for singles sites?!?! Thats crap!!!!
I would make him stop and he better damn ask for my forgiveness and admit he screwed up, or bye bye bye!!!! Leave him alone to be with his pathetic fantasies


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